10 December 1988
Well, I didn’t know that ‘Mistletoe And Wine’ was originally from a musical version of Hans Christian Andersen’s story The Little Match Girl, screened on UK television in the mid-’80s, set in Victorian London, without the more religious lyrics, and sung by Twiggy as the character of a bawdy East End lady of the night. Obviously Cliff for his version holied it up a bit and took out the sex worker angle, though I can envisage him in the original setting and perhaps playing it as Jack The Ripper.
Anyway, this was the first of Cliff’s regular assaults on my childhood Christmas listening. Now, there are some religious Christmas songs I love and which still capture the excitement and magic of the season even for atheists like me; Mario Lanza singing ‘O Holy Night’ may be the best example. But Cliff’s ‘Mistletoe And Wine’ is insufferably sanctimonious; there’s no joy or wonder or love in it, just the same glazed-eye litany as a First Holy Communion mass. It doesn’t help that Cliff, always a bland and shallow singer, delivers his evangelical performance in the video (below) with the creepy anti-charisma of a cult leader: Christmas in Jonestown, and mind that wine before you drink it. Why does Cliff always have to go and spoil our Christmas by dragging religion into it?
