The Irish World Cup Players Pool – ‘Watch Your House For Ireland’

29 April 1994

Ugh: the splashy branding and the mercantile-sounding group name—presumably The Irish World Cup Players Numbered Swiss Bank Account was taken—should tell you that this USA ’94 venture was well removed from the joy and innocence of Italia ’90. Ireland’s USA ’94 campaign in toto reflects this too. Despite a few highs—actually winning a game, Paul McGrath, Aldo’s swearing—there were a lot of lows and totes awks: the farcical squad photo; the Three Amigos; George the Greek; Steve Staunton vs the sun; the mind-bendingly dreadful Norway game; Packie Bonner’s uncharacteristic howler; The Homecoming. Roy Keane’s bust-up with management was the harbinger of a World Cup to come. (Aside from that, I enjoyed the 1994 World Cup, even the much-maligned final.)

I can’t find this Ireland team song or its video anywhere online, which may be for the best, so you’ll have to bear with me as I delve deep into my mind palace to retrieve whatever shards of it litter my mental palatial floor. Much like Ireland’s USA ’94, ‘Watch Your House For Ireland’ mixed a little high with a lotta low. Lead vocals were by Christy Dignam, and no one would begrudge him a chart-topper. The song itself, though, was crappier than ‘Put ‘Em Under Pressure’. “It’s wham, bam for Uncle Sam!” sings Christy in the verse, “Ireland, on our way / Watch your house in the USA!” sing the squad in the chorus, and I don’t recall things getting any better from there on. Even mild terrace-level snark at Eamon Dunphy and Jimmy Hill didn’t add any spice or energy; had things gone better over there, perhaps Aldo could have dropped a diss track about the official in the yellow baseball cap. If it was your first World Cup you may have fond memories, but otherwise this record just adds to the vibe of USA ’94 being an underwhelming experience.

But at least the 1994 official team song matched its 1990 predecessor and stayed at number one all World Cup summer long, right? Wrong! Just a solitary week at the top for the Irish Players Beer And Poker Fund; a new Irish cultural phenomenon was about to sweep away all before it, from a completely unexpected source.