9 June 1995
A glam rock U2 record is… actually not a bad idea, especially at this point in time. Alter-egos and crunchy guitars were already part of the Zoo TV aesthetic. Their long-time co-producer was part of glam-era Roxy Music, whose first two albums are essential glam artefacts: surely Eno would be able to dust off his feather boa, wheel out an analogue synth, and lend Bono some shoes with even higher stacked heels. Most importantly, I love the ’70s first-wave glam rock of T. Rex, Bowie, Sparks and Roxy, along with the ’80s glam-funk of Prince and the ’90s glam-indie of Suede, so a glam U2 record would even appeal to me. They might just be able to pull this off.
Alas, ‘Hold Me, Thrill Me, Copy Me, Paste Me’ isn’t really that glam U2 record. Yes, it starts off like ‘Children Of The Revolution’ with those stomping riffs and symphonic swoops, plus in the ’50s-influenced glam manner it re-uses the Bo Diddley beat last heard on ‘Desire’. However, once it gets into the business of verses and choruses, the glam fades; the song itself is just another rehash of Zoo TV aphorisms and Achtung Baby religiosity over bland and tired ’90s stadium rock that recoils from the more experimental stretches of Zooropa. In short, I was bored, and that’s not something you can say about a proper glam rock record. I had forgotten it was, rather incongruously, on the soundtrack of one of those ’90s Batman sequels, but then again I had forgotten those sequels too. Forgotten really is the operative word here.
