24 July 2014
Here’s the last of Cheryl’s four solo Irish chart-toppers. And Girls Aloud only had one! You people.
Suffice it to say, ‘Crazy Stupid Love’ hasn’t matured into a Xenomania-level banger like fine wine ageing in the cellar. The percussion and saxophone come across as a lazy mash-up of generic ‘Latino’ R&B-pop with parping ’00s dance hit ‘Destination Calabria’. Tinie Tempah turns in the sort of perfunctory rap break that you invariably get with such corporate pop product. Cheryl herself sounds like she’s only doing this as obligatory tie-in merch for her other ventures.
Typical of the uninspired inanity on offer in ‘Crazy Stupid Love’ is the chorus lyric of “It’s like a rollercoaster / but I’m only going up” – in other words, cranking along interminably, all laboured and tedious, without any release of excitement. Let that be this track’s epitaph.
