26 March 2015
Back in 2015 I doubt you’d have predicted the decade to come would feature a global pandemic shutdown or major democracies trying out fascism. On a slightly lesser order of bleakness, who’d have thought we’d still have bland male folk-pop dominating our charts? Mumford & Sons and George Ezra wouldn’t sound out of place in today’s top tens, and I mean that to hurt. Our own Hozier went to number one in the US and UK in 2024, having peaked at no. 2 in both territories with ‘Take Me To Church’ ten years earlier. And the biggest worldwide chart-topper of 2025 so far, Alex Warren’s optimistically-titled ‘Ordinary’, ploughs a similar furrow to James Bay’s ‘Hold Back The River’. Even worse, there’s now also an adjacent male country-pop variant. Yes, things were better back then—they were probably better back in the Middle Ages too—but there are healthier coping mechanisms than nostalgia for The James Bay Vibe.
‘Hold Back The River’ starts off in the shy, buskery Ed Sheeran style, as was more prevalent at that moment in the mid-’10s. Otherwise, this is textbook ’20s folk-pop guy: low, rumbling voice; stripped-back guitar and drums; gospel-tinged backing vocals; vague verses marking time until big chorus; the word “river” as catch-all signifier for soulfulness and emotions and the like. Also, Bay wears a hat, because that’s authentic. I was so bored. I still am. Surely the 2024 girl-pop insurgency will come again and reclaim the world for the forces of Good and Interesting once Charli, Chappell, Sabrina and maybe even O-Rod get their follow-ups sorted. In the meantime, a phalanx of bland folk-pop guys splutter droplets of ‘Hold Back The River’ into the public airspace while I languish in this Guantánamo Bay.
